Mega Dork

Had to share... keep watching until the end!

Invasion of the Purse Snatchers

My next blog was going to cover my vacation road trip through Ohio but sometimes life gets in the way and you have something more immediate to say. So here's the story:

It was after pole dancing class and Jen, Monica and I decided to go get a drink at the Village Inn in Sylvania (nice area.) We sat outside because it was a warm night. Soon Monica got tired and left as it was starting to get dark, Jen and I stayed for a few more drinks.

We were talking, laughing, drinking... when all of a sudden I see this hand reach over my shoulder and grab my purse... which was sitting right in front of me on the table. At first I thought it was a joke, maybe somebody I knew messing with me. But as I heard the feet pounding farther away I realized I'd just been robbed!

It's been awhile since I moved so fast, trying to run down two teenage boys (and I say boys because they were very very young.) But I was wearing crappy shoes, and I'm not exactly a long distance runner. Knowing I was falling behind, I did the only thing I could think of... I shouted obscenities and tried to get a good description of the punks.

Walking back to the bar I saw several other distraught women jogging toward me (man I must have been moving fast,) seems the assholes had gotten more than just my purse. When I got back Jen was on the phone with the cops, she had reached for her phone the second I took off. Within minutes Sylvania cop cars were all over the place looking for the thieves.

I called JR(with Jen's phone) and left a message since I had no keys, no wallet, no cellphone. I think I was most upset about my phone. The other stuff can be replaced (although I knew it'd be a pain in the ass) but the only phone numbers I know by heart are JR's, my parents, and work.

Anyway, thank god the bartender had gotten an upclose look at the kids, she had kicked them out a few times already that night. So she went with the police who actually had a pretty good idea who the robbers were (guess there was a big party with kids going on down the street) to ID the suspects. At this point Jen just kept handing me drinks, which I was slamming back.

JR showed up about the same time the cops came back... now with a brown evidence bag in hand. They asked for Elaine.. which threw me for a second until I realized they probably meant me since that's my middle name. With rubber gloves on the (sweet) cop gingerly pulled my purse out of the bag... wallet, cellphone, and keys... all there, but out of place. Apparently the kid dropped it in the nearby church parking lot because we were chasing him.

The officer had me go through my stuff to see what was missing. Three bucks, some change... and my sense of security was all I lost last night. He asked me if I wanted to press charges, my answer... "Hell Yes."

I was so relieved to get everything important back, but I felt bad for the other girl who was robbed. They found her wallet, but not her purse. Still, they captured one of the purse snatchers (the one who grabbed mine) and you know he'll squeal on his friend.

I've got to hand it to the Sylvania PD, I'm not a fan of cops, but they were all over this incident and did a really good job catching the bad guys. I thought I was safe in Sylvania, lesson learned. But on the same note if this had happened in Toledo I doubt the police would have been so quick to respond.

Home Sweet Home

I thought I'd blog and catch everyone up on my life. We went up north, to Mt. Pleasant, Michigan for a friend's wedding back in June. Mt. P is the home of Central Michigan University, where we went to college. JR goes up there all the time since his parents live nearby, but I haven't been since Thanksgiving. While it was only a weekend trip, it felt like a summer vacation. I took a ton of pictures as we revisted our old haunts.

Here's a map, Mt. Pleasant is located in central Michigan (under the flying "C") which is about 3 hours north of Toledo.



Our first stop was one of our favorite restaurants.



We used to go here for special dates, like birthdays and anniversaries. It was a delight to go again after so long (although the food wasn't as good as I remembered.) It was a totally new experience, we had forgotten all the little things... like the waitress writing her name upside down in crayon on the table.



The next day we hung out at his parent's house.



His parents love being outside, and it shows.



They live on 40 acres and have a huge pole barn...



filled with tons of toys...



including JR's baby...



an '85 Chevy 4X4.



We went for a ride.



Then cleaned up for our friend's wedding. It was beautiful.



But sunny. Only 15 minutes without sunblock and I got a nasty sunburn (the line is from my dress strap, which is pulled down.)



Sun aside, we had a great time and got to hang out with friends we hadn't seen since our wedding.





And oh yeah, it was one of "those" weddings.



After the wedding came the bar(s). The first stop was the downtown bar where the groom works. They've added on since I was last there, but it still feels the same. Whenever I'm there I can't help but hear Toby Keith's song "I Love this Bar" playing in my head.



We met up with some other friends and hopped over to the new piano bar in town.



Then we were hungry, so we hit up another college favorite, always open.



Est. 1973



The next day, more food at the Hunan House buffett (best Chinese food in the world) then a tour through campus.



Before heading out of town. I used to work at this 7/11.



It was wonderful to get away from Toledo and hang out with some of my favorite people. I miss them all so much. Coming back to Ohio was really hard. The trip made JR and I realize how much we love Mountain Town, and while we know things will never be the same as when we were in college, I think we would both be a lot happier if we moved back. Maybe we'll get the chance some day.

Duck Watch '08

More duck drama to report. If you recall, two winters ago I became very upset after seeing a clearly injured duck hanging out at the pond at my apartment. Sadly it was a tale that did not end well. One day he just disappeared, the poor guy either froze to death or was eaten after the pond iced over. Flash forward to this spring when the ducks returned, mated, and went off the lay eggs. I waited patiently to see the yearly crop of cute ducklings when a few weeks ago I was rewarded with the sight of at least 10 baby ducks and their mom swimming around. A few Geese and their hatchlings have also moved into the neighborhood.

Then about two or three days ago I noticed a few ducklings wandering around, but couldn't see any adults with them. Well, yesterday my fears were confirmed when just 5 baby ducks waddled over to underneath our balcony. The group couldn't be more than a few weeks old and they're already orphaned. I have no idea what happened to mommy or the other five babies, but I have several suspicions.

Feeling bad for the hungry babies I got some bread and tossed it down to them. Pretty soon an adult male duck flew in check out the food situation. I got nervous thinking he would run off the little ones. After all male ducks have no part in raising their young (I looked it up) and I've seen them get violent with each other (I'm pretty sure I witnessed a gay duck rape.) Anyway, my fears turned out to be pointless because as soon as the adult went for the bread one of the babies charged him, and the big guy backed down.

As the male duck waddled away from the scrappy orphans I noticed he was limping. Upon closer inspection I saw that the poor guy is missing a foot! We've decided to call him "gimpy" and pretend he's a pirate. But I think there is a sadder twist to his story. I think "gimpy" is really the ducklings dad. He sticks pretty close to them, although his single dad skills suck.

Since he can fly I'm not too worried about his health. The babies should also be all right. The entire pond community seems to be tolerating them and even looking out for them. Last night we heard an awful ruckus from the geese, turns out the fox was out patrolling the area. And while I know it's survival of the fittest and the circle of life and all that crap, I still wanted to stop the predator from getting his teeth on our ducks (and geese.) I don't know if he got any, but I haven't seen the babies yet today.

I've decided to stop feeding them anyway. White bread holds no nutrition for the growing ducklings, and the less human interference they receive the better off they will be. Cross your fingers that they'll all make it this time!

Parental Guidance

They say you can never go home again, and while that's true, you can stop in for a visit. I got my wedding video this week and since my parents only live an hour away I decided to take them a copy and spend some time with them. I love my parents, they have always been there and always offered support.

My sister and I always talk about how lucky we are to have such great people as parents. I often think about thanking them for everything they've done. From raising me right, giving me every advantage, and for always making me feel loved.

But despite all my nostalgic musings things never go as planned. For some reason no matter how hard I try, whenever I get together with my parents I turn back into that surly 16 year old who just wants to be left alone. I cross my arms and answer their questions with a bored tone... I complain about what's on TV... I argue with my mother about her views on current events.

It's like a switch gets flipped and all my promises to myself to tell my folks how much I appreciate them get pushed aside. My sister says the same thing happens to her, and I've seen my husband do it with his parents. Maybe it's just an ingrained action... like Pavlov’s dog. Whatever it is, I hope they realize how much they mean to me.

Final Spin

Hard to believe 8 weeks went by so fast, but here I am... feeling sexy and without a pole. Class is over, only there was no final exam so I'm not quite sure how I did. My goals at the beginning were to gain confidence and a social life, plus get into better shape.

Well I know how I scored on the last one… pretty damn good. I'm not a toned Goddess, but I have more strength than I can remember ever having (even if that means I also have bruises I've never had before.) Sure I still jiggle but it's not as bad as when I started. Plus, let's face it... I will ALWAYS jiggle… even if I weigh 100 pounds... it's part of my genetic make-up.

So what about my social life? Well, I'm not sure if it's the class or the end of winter but it sure seems like I've been going out more with different people. Maybe I'm just putting more effort into it, but I like it.

As for my confidence, I'll give myself a solid "C." I do stand up for myself more but I have a ways to go. It's nice to have a little more spring in my step and know I could put a man on his knees with a few sexy moves. Although I already have JR and he has always been crazy about me.

Still, I secretly fantasize about having everyone I think treats me badly (boys and girls) come and watch me dance. I want to show them I do have power and that there is so much more to me than what they see at work. Right now I'm just jonesing bad for the pole and it's only been a day. I've even considered buying a portable one I can use at home (however I don't think the Rents would approve.) It's a silly thing to want, considering I'm basically a novice. And even though I have performed all the moves at least once, I still need a lot of work.

But never fear... I have a solution. I've signed up for the next session... now if I can just make it until the end of the month!

Shrinking

Apparently JR and I will make terrible parents.

We decided to try growing some sprouting garlic bulbs a few weeks ago. If they lived we thought we’d try a pet, and then eventually a kid. Sadly, I don’t think the garlic is going to make it. They were doing well until we moved them into some new dirt... now they’re shriveling up and turning brown. Today, I set the pot in the sun on our balcony in a last ditch effort to save them, but I fear it’s too late.

Granted it wasn’t really a plant and we were just experimenting to see what would happen, but I’m still bummed. My mom has always kept plants around the house, and JR grew up on a farm for crying out loud! But it looks like neither one of us has a good green thumb.

On the plus side... the diet is going well. Together JR and I lost 11 pounds this week.. not too shabby!