By the power vested in me...

I learned an interesting fact this weekend. Apparently in the state of Michigan a man legally owns his wife's hair.

So theoretically I'll have to ask JR's permission to cut, dye, style, (and yes even shave,) any of my hair. Of course he finds this all hilarious and anytime he catches me touching my hair he makes comments about how it's really "his" hair.

This got me nervous about any other "unusual" laws we might encounter when we get married. A few Google searches later and I discovered a whole bevy of strange laws across this great county of ours.

Some of these I've heard before. In fact I'm fairly certain we did a sweeps PKG last year about this. But in case you were unaware I've complied a list of my favorites below.

Other bizarre Michigan laws:

Cars may not be sold on Sunday.

Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony. (Because so many preteens have felonious records.)

It is against the law for a lady to lift her skirt more than 6 inches while walking through a mud puddle.

Married couples must live together or be imprisoned. (I know a few people who would take option two.)

In Detroit, couples are not allowed to make love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property.

Single guys and gals caught in the act of sex in Michigan can be fined as much as $5,000, and they could be sentenced to as many as five years in prison.

It is illegal to loiter in the city morgue in Detroit. (And I heard it was the new "cool" place to hang out.)

A man can also get 20 years in Michigan for placing "his spouse in a brothel."

U.S. Laws:
It's illegal to have sex with a corpse anywhere in the United States. (Thank goodness for THAT.)

As recently as 1990, these states had laws against the use of dildos: Idaho, Utah, Arizona, Oklahoma, Minnesota, Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia, Maryland, Massachusetts, Rhode Island and Washington D.C. (I feel bad for all the single women in those states, makes lonely nights even lonelier.)

Bikini car washes (where women wash cars topless) are prohibited in most states, but the fine is only $50 per incident, so places charge an extra $50 to recoup their legal costs.

Federal law forbids recycling used eyeglasses in the United States.

Impotence is grounds for divorce in twenty-four states in the United States. (Wonder if Viagra will change this law.)

Mid-West Laws:

In Indiana, mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a "tendency to habitually kiss other humans."

In Minnesota, it is illegal for any man to have sexual intercourse with a live fish. (Are dead fish ok?)

In Oxford, Ohio, it's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture. (mmm, ok...)

In the quiet town of Connorsville, Wisconsin, it's illegal for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner has an orgasm. (Talk about going out with a BANG.)

No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth. (LOVE this one, I'm moving.)

Monkeys are forbidden from smoke cigarettes in South Bend, Indiana.

In Ohio it is illegal to get a fish drunk. (What's with the fish?)

Southern Laws:

In Alabama, it's against the law for a man to seduce "a chaste woman by means of temptation, deception, arts, flattery or a promise of marriage."

An excerpt from Kentucky state legislation: "No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she be escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club."

In Romboch, Virginia, it is illegal to engage in sexual activity with the lights on.

In Quitman, Georgia, it is illegal for a chicken to cross the road. (But not against the law to tell bad jokes.)

Every citizen of Kentucky is required by law to take a bath once a year.

In Miami, Florida it is illegal for a man to wear any kind of strapless gown. (Ironic)

In Alabama, dominoes may not be played on Sunday.

In Arkansas, a man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month. (Well that makes sense.)

In Oklahoma, no baseball team can hit the ball over the fence or out of a ballpark. (Explains why there are no pro teams in Oklahoma.)

Eastern Laws:

The only acceptable sexual position in Washington, D.C. is the missionary position. Any other sexual position is considered illegal. (No Honeymoon at the Capitol for me.)

In Waterville, Maine, it is illegal to blow one's nose in public.

In New York, it is against the law for a blind person to drive an automobile. (Gee, ya think?)

"Coasting on Beaver Street" is illegal in Edgeworth, Pa. ('nuff said.)

Under the Code of 1650 in the New Haven Colony (in what is now Connecticut), a 16-year-old boy could be put to death if he "cursed, struck or disobeyed" his parents or was "stubborn or rebellious." (Bring that law back please!)

It used to be a $200 fine in Vermont to deny the "existence or being of God."

A minister in Pennsylvania is not supposed to perform a marriage ceremony if either the bride or the groom is drunk. (Not a lot of weddings there I guess.)

West of the Mississippi Laws:

In the state of Utah, sex with an animal—unless performed for profit—is not considered sodomy and therefore is legal.

In the state of Washington there is a law against having sex with a virgin under any circumstances, including the wedding night. (Wonder how that's supposed to work?)

It's against the law in Willowdale, Oregon, for a husband to curse during sex.

In Texas, sixteen-year old divorced girls are prohibited from talking about sex during high school extracurricular activities.

In Montana, it is a felony for a wife to open her husband's mail.

In Mesquite, Texas it is illegal for kids to have unusual haircuts. (Please tell me Mullets are included in this.)

In 1985, an Arizona legislator proposed that each candidate for the legislature take a reading and an I.Q. test three months before the election. The scores would have been posted on the ballot, had the bill passed. But a majority of legislators, for whatever reason, voted it down.

It is illegal for any member of the Nevada legislature to conduct official business wearing a penis costume while the legislature is in session. (I'm sure there is a story behind this.)

A Utah legislator proposed a resolution urging that each TV weather person be required to provide an ice cream cone to every member of the state House of Representatives whenever the forecast was wrong. The resolution failed. (They would have been forced to reduce taxes every time THEY were wrong.)

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And to note, as weird and bad as these outdated laws may seem, America has it easy. Here are a few quick samples from other countries:

In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's lover may be killed in any manner desired.

There are men in Guam whose full-time job it is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time. Why? Under the law in Guam, it is forbidden for virgins to marry.

The Romans would crush a first-time rapist's gonads between two stones.

Sodomy has long been a serious offense in Peru. A person who has engaged in it is first dragged through the streets on a rope. Hanging comes next. Finally, the corpse is burned while fully clothed. (Yikes)